This sucks!

I'm at work right now. I can't concentrate at all.

My dog had surgery this morning to remove a mass on his side. When the vet opened him up he said that he was pretty certain it was cancerous, and that it was pretty invasive. What that means for the time being, I don't know. The mass is being sent off for testing to determine the type and severity of the cancer. We won't have results for a few days.

We adopted this dog from the pound 10 years ago (almost to the day!) when he was 2 months old. He's older than our children. I knew he wasn't going to last much longer, but he hasn't been acting like anything is wrong.

In fact, the only reason we brought him to the vet is because, what we had been told a few months earlier was just a lipoma and nothing to worry about, had changed size and texture drastically over the last week.

It's just such a shock.

I feel like I want the last 12 months back. It seems like everything that could go wrong, has gone wrong.

Starting at about this time last year:

Hubby lost his job because his employer ran out of money to pay their employees. He found another job, but it was still stressful for a little while.

Found out the Chipmunk was missing a testicle.

Around labor day, the Chipmunk had Roseola twice! A hospital visit for dehydration was included somewhere in there for him.

The Chipmunk had surgery to locate the missing testicle a few days before Halloween. We spent the night of Halloween in the ER due to an infection from the surgery, as well as dehydration.

My husband broke his shoulder on thanksgiving day.

Right before valentine's day I came down with mastoiditis - aka the ear infection from HELL - that lasted 4 months.

In the beginning of March, the kids and I all had the stomach flu so bad the Chipmunk and I had to be hospitalized for dehydration.

In June, I was diagnosed with scoliosis, degenerating disk disease, and bone spurs - at least I finally got an explanation for the back pain I've been suffering with for years.

The day after fathers day Hubby took 30 Tylenol PM and 6 vicodin, in an attempt to kill himself. A result of him taking too many prescribed steroids for his asthma and allergies.

The next week, the Monkey was diagnosed with asthma and has been given the greatest number of prescriptions than anyone else in the household combined.

The week after that, it was confirmed that the Chipmunk is extremely allergic to cows milk - making it nearly impossible for daycare to feed him anything she feeds anyone else in her care.

And now, the dog.

I think I would really like to slow down for a little bit. If I believed in god I would probably be thinking something along the lines of "you don't get more than you can handle".

But I don't believe in god. So, I have nothing to rely on but myself.

And I'm not sure how much more I can handle.


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